Sexy Hats & Toothpaste Farts | Brokenwood | "The Power of Steam" | Mystery Maniacs Podcast EP233
Oh, no. You're gonna tell the story.
Mark:I'm tell the story.
Sarah:Brace yourselves, people.
Mark:Hey, maniacs. Hey, maniacs. Mystery maniacs is a comedy recap podcast dedicated to mystery TV. Each week we dig into an episode of the show including the murders, the mayhem, the loonies and everything else we love.
Sarah:This week Broken Woods season six episode one, the power of steam.
Mark:I'm Mark.
Sarah:That was steam. I'm Sarah.
Mark:Sounded like a fart. I hope I don't fart, steam.
Sarah:Kinda do. I I don't know. Oh, I don't Body temperature, I guess.
Mark:I guess.
Sarah:Anyway I will. That note, ready to start?
Mark:Wow. Yes. If you let your kids go to steampunk conventions, they should be able to listen to
Sarah:this episode. Fake goggles and glue gears to
Mark:their clothes. Lot of goggles in this episode.
Sarah:They can listen to this podcast. Before we dive in two exciting things. No three exciting things.
Mark:Three.
Sarah:One, somebody has tickets. Yes. To Midsummer on stage.
Mark:In Sweden. They're in Sweden and they have tickets to Midsummer on stage.
Sarah:Because we're maniacs.
Mark:I cannot believe they got tickets, first of all.
Sarah:We have one correspondent. Yes. That's one very exciting thing.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:Two exciting things. Ludwig on BritBox, David Mitchell's new mystery show. It's awesome. Two episodes are up already in The US. Watch them.
Mark:I'm gonna say it's a detective show, not a mystery show.
Sarah:Okay. It's awesome. It's funny. It's like
Mark:It's exactly like we thought it
Sarah:was going It's got puzzly stuff and it's got David Mitchell
Mark:who I David Mitchell playing dual roles sort of.
Sarah:Well, he's a twin but his twin is missing. We don't see his twin so Yes.
Mark:David, it's a fish out of water plus super brainiac
Sarah:Puzzles. Plus,
Mark:you know, your relationship with your sister-in-law and family past histories. There's lots of stuff there.
Sarah:Very good. Yep. I think everybody will like it. Yes. Third, and maybe the most exciting, Halloween has started.
Sarah:Yes. I have started garage time.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:Spring break is usually the kickoff of garage time. Yes. I'm stoked.
Mark:We also watched Traders US the final and Traders UK this week.
Sarah:Yep. Both very good.
Mark:And we tried to find Traders Canada and we're only presented Traders Hungary. No. Not interested in. I wish we could watch Traders Canada but
Sarah:It looks like it's good. Not as good as The Power of Steam.
Mark:So The Power of Steam, 11/10/2019 directed by Oliver Driver and written by Tim Baum and did you happen to notice who else wrote it? No. A young man by the name of Nick Sampson. Ah, Breen. Breen is the co writer of this episode.
Sarah:I'm not gonna say that explains anything.
Mark:No. Well perhaps the secret red hair mafia. Maybe. Information Network.
Sarah:But there's racism, homophobia, incels, and steampunk all in the same episode. Yeah. It's a lot. It's a lot. They could've left steampunk out of it, really.
Sarah:I mean, didn't really matter.
Mark:Were you confused at first as to like, Mike has a dog. That's okay.
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:But Mike is like really close to that car at first and I thought, is Mike driving that car? It was weird to me.
Sarah:No. But he's so he's at the end of the drive that leads to the aerodrome where the event is happening and he's walking with the dog which leads me to think he lives really close to there.
Mark:We've done this in a number of episodes. You cannot run a Georgian manor by yourself. Mm-mm. You cannot run an asylum with two people. Nope.
Mark:You certainly cannot run a ballooning company with one person.
Sarah:I assume that he has a helper who only shows up when he has a booking.
Mark:Maybe?
Sarah:I mean, somebody has to pull the balloon down.
Mark:Well somebody tied it down later on but
Sarah:Well it's supposed to be. Yeah. Like he go he takes people for rides which means it's tethered. You get in it goes up it comes back down. Somebody else gets in.
Mark:But filling the balloon full of gas
Sarah:I don't think one person can set up a hot
Mark:air think so either. So his escape seems a bit weird.
Sarah:But anyway Maybe he's handier than you think he is.
Mark:Yes. Michael is walking the dog and we see a scene later across a lake where the fireworks are going. So, Mike has gone around the lake with the dog to walk the dog.
Sarah:He's home.
Mark:It's a lot of dog walking.
Sarah:It's dark by the time he gets home with the dog. Yeah.
Mark:It's a lot of dog walking.
Sarah:That poor dog and its short little legs.
Mark:Short little well, know a corgis. Deadliest breed. Deadliest breed.
Sarah:Kahu's gone. He's on an oil rig. So he's done. Yes. And this see him again.
Mark:The Sunday night steam fest party thing, I guess.
Sarah:How do we know it's on a Sunday night?
Mark:Because everybody's at work the next day, and I think somebody says something about Sunday or it's Monday or something like that.
Sarah:Well, it has all of the tropes of steampunk. There's a penny farthing. There's a lot of gears glued to things. Everybody's got top hats and goggles. Everybody.
Sarah:Of course, it's random tubing. I think steampunk is cool,
Mark:but Breen says it's Sunday night because he's making
Sarah:Oh, that's right. He had, like, he had a fillet of lamb or whatever.
Mark:Yeah.
Sarah:It's just, it's like Halloween steampunk, I guess.
Mark:It is.
Sarah:It's not
Mark:Which is okay for
Sarah:steampunk or something. You know? Here's what I don't understand about this event. This is the Brokenwood Aeronauts Steampunk Convivial, which is a fantastic name.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:It's being held at Alden's hot air balloon place.
Mark:Yes. And he is JR Brocclesbury. Brocclesby.
Sarah:And the point of this convivial is to raise money so the people attending the convivial can go to a different bigger event somewhere else.
Mark:The Omaru Steampunk Festival.
Sarah:Which is a real thing and we'll talk about it. Yep. But I don't understand how the people there raising money for themselves makes sense.
Mark:Well, the closest I could get to that is it takes eighteen hours by car to get there. Oh my gosh. From where they are, plus a ferry ride.
Sarah:Okay.
Mark:So it is by no means easy to get to.
Sarah:I understand raising money to go someplace. I just don't understand how the same people can raise money for themselves to go someplace.
Mark:It is kinda like sports fundraising where you're kind of selling like fundraising
Sarah:stuff to your own parents Yeah. It'd be easier for them to just pay for your trip. Yeah. Like that. Yeah.
Sarah:Exactly. That's what I'm thinking.
Mark:It's it's it's a little weird. I was very pleased there was no silly mic noise No. At any point in this.
Sarah:There's no No. They got doctor devious behind the bar and a scary woman in a gas mask making snacks. Yeah. I don't wanna eat snacks from a lady in a gas mask.
Mark:Yeah. She seemed extremely weird.
Sarah:Kinda bane.
Mark:Yeah. She was kinda bane. Do you wanna choose roll? I have pigs in a brink. Sorry.
Sarah:They covered the porta potties with bike wheels. Yes. To make them blend in.
Mark:Yeah. Which they didn't really need to do, but I understand why.
Sarah:It doesn't make them blend in. No. They look like porta potties covered in bike wheels.
Mark:They do.
Sarah:And if anything should stand out, it's the toilets. You should be able to find them easily.
Mark:That's absolutely true.
Sarah:Plus they're blue and yellow. Bike wheels are not gonna hide that.
Mark:Nope. But luckily, our boys are there to do the fireworks.
Sarah:Who's a billion Nigel?
Mark:Yeah, I think so.
Sarah:Did you get nervous when the first one didn't go off and they just walked right up to it?
Mark:I was extremely nervous.
Sarah:I was like wait, wait, wait. Make sure it's not going to go off. They're so drunk.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:At one point, they're talking to, I think, Breen, and he's got like a whole armful and he just starts to light them like, what are you doing? People are too drunk to be near fireworks.
Mark:And the old crotchety guy goes to the porta loos and opens the door and goes, you.
Sarah:Yeah. And goes in the ladies porta loo. I don't think I've ever seen porta potties labeled men's and women's.
Mark:They kind of self select I think. Like the most experience I've had are like at camps or festivals.
Sarah:Usually, it's in a
Mark:big line. Yeah.
Sarah:I don't know. But porta potty exploding is really, really gross.
Mark:It is it is bad, bad news.
Sarah:And I don't care how much they rope off. The fact that there are things found like often trees that were in that porta potty like ears and hats Yep. Means the other Stuff? Things that were part of that porta potty are also spread that far. I'm not going anywhere near that joint.
Sarah:No. No. No. No. No.
Sarah:No. No. And yet another thing to worry about when you have to use a porta potty. I thought it was just tipping over or catching a disease now you got to worry about it blowing up
Mark:I think that it would be I think the mythbusters tried it
Sarah:tried to blow one up I think so well Gina thinks it's a landmine
Mark:well of course we
Sarah:should block single file so we have less chance of setting off another mine I'm sorry about the bad accent. You have to expect it's the worst thing.
Mark:She's totally A landmine? Really, Gina? She's completely giddy that the victim is in several pieces.
Sarah:It's like Tetris. But it don't have all the pieces.
Mark:So let's talk about this thing of steampunk in Omaru.
Sarah:The big event that they're raising money to go to.
Mark:Yes. So they It
Sarah:must be big enough to be well known enough that they think that people watching the episode will recognize what they're talking about.
Mark:Well, it is the home of Steampunk HQ, an art collaboration and gallery in the historic Victoria precinct of Oumuru, New Zealand. It was opened in 2011. And they do in fact have a festival. It is the annual steampunk news Steampunk New Zealand festival
Sarah:Not steampunk.
Mark:Which is held on the Queen's birthday weekend early in June. Three days of fashion activities and art shows.
Sarah:Wow. Three days? Three days.
Mark:Now this town only has 14,000 people in it.
Sarah:That's It must
Mark:completely take over the town.
Sarah:Oh, how many people attend?
Mark:I don't know. It doesn't say, but it is. It has been listed as one of the building itself. It's one of the highest rated tourist attractions in New Zealand.
Sarah:And I think
Mark:they have a five story building with a locomotive all decked out in front of it.
Sarah:Dang. And it's in June, so that's the middle of winter. Yeah. It's No wonder it's inside.
Mark:It's super That's cool. I guess it's a super
Sarah:It's like Gen Con, but for steampunk.
Mark:Yeah. And I guess, like, it's just created by a bunch of artists who got together and did this who liked steampunk. So I'm assuming they kind of, like, just grew it naturally.
Sarah:Mhmm. Well, that's how, like, Burning Man started.
Mark:They have some artists. Like, they're so fun. They have a gadgetorium, which is a secret room in the building with unusual creatures, relics, and machines. A dress up booth.
Sarah:We have a gadgetorium.
Mark:They have a portal, a gateway to other dimensions, both real and imagined. And a workshop that has like a permanent stage and all sorts of fun super stuff and they have a cool kind of merch too.
Sarah:That sounds really cool. Too bad it's basically on another planet from where we live.
Mark:Yeah. Like, if I was in New Zealand, I would definitely go here, but
Sarah:You drive eighteen hours and get on the boat and everything else to get there?
Mark:Not in New Zealand. No. So we go back to the cop shop and I am stuck. Yes. Because there's a different sign.
Mark:So now I am It's
Sarah:not about Nigel's coffee cups anymore.
Mark:Obsessed with the new sign. They don't spend enough time on the new sign. I get a couple of words Oh, no. But they don't say what it is. Hopefully, in the future, they don't change it and I can find out what the sign says.
Sarah:Do you want to guess what you think it says
Mark:from what you can read? This
Sarah:will be interesting.
Mark:It says broken wood at the top and it looks like there are circles or magnets on one side and it's like it says blank fridge watch society. I don't know what the fridge watch society is.
Sarah:I would think it would be the Brokenwood Police Station fridge watch society. I guess. They're looking out for Nigel's leftovers. Or maybe missus or Marlow's ear in a Tupperware container.
Mark:I guess? Sort of?
Sarah:Fridges and workspaces are special.
Mark:Yeah. And they don't stand in front of it enough and I'm disappointed with them because I definitely wanted to see more.
Sarah:We got to see plenty of Timmy Time toilet tanks.
Mark:Yes. So Timmy is a special guy.
Sarah:He's got a business. He's an entrepreneur.
Mark:He is straight out of entrepreneurial.
Sarah:Skill. He's doing better than Frodo.
Mark:Like it's almost like it's AAA Timmies.
Sarah:So he can be first in the phone book.
Mark:So then he says that they has to do a little pro bono work in the first year of business, which is straight out of business Oh.
Sarah:Richness you go to
Mark:textbooks.
Sarah:If you go to how to start your own business Yep. Seminar, they'll tell you that.
Mark:So then he's and this I think is a scene written by Breen because he's also he's cleaning the port a loos
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:But he's also drinking and he drinks this stuff that's blue Yeah. And you lose a sense of
Sarah:Is he drinking cleaning fluid? And And he's a little too wavy aroundy of the brush too.
Mark:He is absolutely all those things. And then we get the flashback with him and we see how horribly racist Lionel is. You know islanders in their bright colors. What?
Sarah:He's horrible.
Mark:He is
Sarah:horrific. I'm glad he blew up into a thousand pieces.
Mark:And I love how Timmy's like, yeah, I have to deal with white male crap all the time. Yeah.
Sarah:Crap from white men. He's used to it.
Mark:So you're you're talking about that that stuff and the explosion, it reminds me The What?
Sarah:I was talking about what?
Mark:The the stuff in the toilet Oh, exploding. It reminds me I had a weird thing happen this week. So we use this charcoal toothpaste. Oh, no.
Sarah:You're gonna tell the story.
Mark:I'm tell the story.
Sarah:Brace yourselves people. So It doesn't matter that it's charcoal toothpaste.
Mark:So it's black. Correct? Black is cool. Because black's cool. And we are down near the end of a particular tube of this toothpaste.
Sarah:To the point where, and everybody will know, where you have to like fold the tube over the nozzle and like press into it with your thumb to get that last bit out of the tube. That's where it was at.
Mark:Now, I was gonna wash my face after brushing my teeth. So I did not have my glasses on. And I put the toothpaste tube and squeezed it and it squeezed a little bit of toothpaste onto my toothbrush. But then a jet of toothpaste infused air or what Sarah calls
Sarah:Toothpaste fart.
Mark:Shot out of the toothpaste tube and went directly into my eyes.
Sarah:We can laugh now because you're not blind, but you thought you were. And if I had to take you to the hospital and explain that toothpaste farted in your eyes, I don't know what I would've said.
Mark:For the second time in three years, I said to myself with my eyes closed, that's it, I'm blind.
Sarah:The time before was when the hornet swarmed you and went inside your glasses. That time, time, it was toothpaste fart.
Mark:They hurt.
Sarah:I bet it did.
Mark:So I started blinking my eyes hoping that I had sight and regained my eyesight and everything was fine. But they were super red
Sarah:Yeah.
Mark:For a little while.
Sarah:And, yeah. The moral of the story is, guys, look out for your toothpaste. It's more dangerous than
Mark:you when
Sarah:you put Safety glasses. Yep. Goggles. Yeah. Steam pump goggles.
Sarah:That that would have saved your eyes if you'd had some on. I'm gonna go into the bathroom and catch you brushing your teeth wearing goggles just in case. Holding the toothbrush and toothpaste as far away from you as Just just just to be safe. You never know. Well, doc, let me tell you what happened to my husband's eyes.
Sarah:They wouldn't believe me. They would think that I did it to you. No. And we were lying.
Mark:They would be like, how did you get toothpaste in your eye?
Sarah:Then And then it went went and then it was in my eyes. So Lionel lights a lighter in the porta potty. Never do that. No. Boom.
Sarah:Never ever do that. I don't care how dark the porta potty is. You don't wanna see.
Mark:And we find that so the guy who runs the balloon place is a suspect. Mhmm. The daughter of Lionel who has a girlfriend that Lionel doesn't like, plus she's Mallory.
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:Which Lionel doesn't like. They're suspects. It's nice that Mike does an interview outside with them and a dog.
Sarah:Because Willie is good to soften people up.
Mark:I guess. Women like dogs.
Sarah:Women like Willie.
Mark:Wow. And considering where this is going in my discussion. I'm So they talked to the the the ladies. Poppy and Cleo. Poppy and Cleo.
Mark:And then Frodo is just fantastic.
Sarah:So His coffee truck is nice.
Mark:Yes. So he comes up and he goes, I don't go in for that kinky model train stuff. So
Sarah:Have you ever considered making a steampunk persona? Like a pasta dish? He was so high.
Mark:He was so high. But okay, so he said kinky model train stuff and for the first time in this episode, there's another point in this episode. I am reminded of extremely strange eighties movies.
Sarah:Wait a minute. Are you about to tell us about model train porn?
Mark:No. It's not model train porn but it's a movie entitled Track 29. So Track 29 is a movie that was directed by Nicholas Rogue. Okay? So he's a well known weirdo director from the eighties who I love his stuff.
Sarah:Of course you do. It's weird. You love weird movies.
Mark:I do in fact love weird movies. It was released in 1988. I'm sure I went to the theater to see this with my high school friends. So it also stars Teresa Russell, Gary Old man and Christopher Lloyd. Now this is the synopsis.
Mark:Okay? Are you ready for this?
Sarah:Okay.
Mark:A doctor's wife tires of his obsession with model trains and spends her days wondering about her son who she gave up for adoption at birth. While eating at a roadside cafe, she encounters a British hitchhiker who turns out to be her son. They spend time together trying to find a bond, the son begins to hate the husband and the wife begins worrying about the safety of her husband and his train set.
Sarah:Because Gary Old man who is her British lost child Yes. Is a psychopath, is he not? I think I've seen a clip from this movie.
Mark:He wears a cowboy hat and a long sided toque. Mhmm. It is a fever dream from start to finish.
Sarah:And this little scene in the train shop made you think of that movie.
Mark:Well mentioning the kinky stuff made me think of that.
Sarah:Okay. I was
Mark:like isn't there a Gary Old man movie with model trains and Teresa Russell and Only you. Weirdness.
Sarah:Alden says that Lionel was into Mary Blayne.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:Do you know what Mary Blayne is?
Mark:Though it's slang for Mary Jane.
Sarah:No. Oh. It's slang for train.
Mark:Oh yes. Yes. Yes.
Sarah:I was like, oh, the Mary Blain. Is that a train? Is that a famous train? No. It's just slang for train.
Mark:It's just slang for train.
Sarah:When Sims goes to the hospital to visit Alden for the first time
Mark:To do more illegal things.
Sarah:The doctor is like, oh sorry to hear about Kahu and you eating all the soup. If you ever want to come over for dinner
Mark:Yeah. Like how does she know? Because there's a secret Secret Ginger network. Information network.
Sarah:That Breen has talked to the red haired doctor and said, if you see Sims, offer to you know take her out or something. She's sad. I know. She doesn't seem sad.
Mark:Yeah. And it seems weird to put that in. It was a bit weird. Especially since Sims basically throws him out of bed soon after. Yeah.
Mark:So I have a question.
Sarah:She throws Alden out of bed. Not Breen No. Or Kavu.
Mark:Yes. Okay.
Sarah:And be careful with your pronouns. You could be confusing.
Mark:I could be confusing. I have a question. Mhmm. The mayor. Mhmm.
Mark:The pharmacist. Mhmm. Does like, how does he do both of those jobs?
Sarah:Being the mayor of a small town is not a full time job.
Mark:I realize that, but it seems that he is full time mayor, full time pharmacy.
Sarah:He's also a full time gay person.
Mark:Well, yes. They have secret meetings once a month.
Sarah:Yeah. He is the representative gay person.
Mark:He is on fire in this episode.
Sarah:He's very funny. I like him a lot. Yeah. Mayor Neil.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:He's almost always standing in front of the shoe inserts. Yes. Don't know why.
Mark:That pharmacy is clearly an actual pharmacy that they filmed in.
Sarah:I just think it's nice that he gives the medicine to the man and says sorry for the delay. And I'm thinking, there wasn't even a line. You haven't been to our CVS.
Mark:Yeah.
Sarah:You wait there for five hours to get something that's already filled.
Mark:Get drugs in The US, man.
Sarah:Yeah, pay for them. Elsa says Bart talks in her sleep, talks in his sleep. Can we talk about Elsa? Elsa, the She Hulk mom. Okay.
Sarah:First of all, she has a bumper sticker that says mother knows best.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:No one should even sell that bumper sticker. No. Shouldn't even exist. No.
Mark:Not at all.
Sarah:And anybody who buys one should get instantly electrocuted.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:Like, and teach you a lesson. Not kill you, but Yep. Teach you a lesson. So she's at the steampunk event because she's spying on her son. Spying.
Sarah:And though she A
Mark:covert activity.
Sarah:Though she has dressed in camo from head to toe and has on face paint, she parks right at the entrance in her mother knows best car.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:She's doing it wrong.
Mark:Yes. She is very much doing it wrong.
Sarah:She chases him around with medication.
Mark:What? Do you think they're trying to imply that his homicidal incelness is caused by his mother.
Sarah:It can't help. Yeah. You know?
Mark:Like, I wanna be clear that incel and homicide are like, they are the fault of the individual.
Sarah:Yes. Okay. Incel culture is horrific. They are not all murderers. I would say most of them are not murderers and don't even fantasize about murder.
Mark:No. But they I love the joke that what's the difference between what what's the same thing between incel and excel? They both don't understand dates properly.
Sarah:Oh. You mean like software?
Mark:Yeah. Okay. It's a nerd joke.
Sarah:That is a nerd joke. He's he doesn't have a hope, though. No. Like, he's an awkward guy, who whose dad left and that damaged him as a kid. But that happens to a lot of people, and they turn out just fine.
Sarah:His mom is smothering. A lot of people are raised by a smothering mother, and they turn out just fine.
Mark:His boss is a crazy Homophobic Racist.
Sarah:Racist. A lot of people have to spend time with homophobic racists I would say they're just fine.
Mark:I would say that probably Lionel had a bigger effect on him than anybody else.
Sarah:Yeah. Because he's also a woman hater, Lionel. So he's a homophobic, racist, misogynist. Yeah. I'm sorry.
Sarah:I had to reach for that word. Yep. He's just horrible. I don't know why Poppy even wants to have a relationship with him. Like I would be like counting the days until I could get away from him if
Mark:I were I I understand it's her dad and everything, but dude. No
Sarah:thanks. But else
Mark:And I I think it's absolutely not an accident that his incel insanity causes the death of the person he cares second most about.
Sarah:Mhmm. It backfires. Yeah. Let's go back to Elsa though. Now that we've talked about all that.
Sarah:Yes. We don't have to go back to any of that. No. We got it all out. Yep.
Sarah:What's Elsa's motive? Does she know Bart did something bad? Is that why she's inserting herself everywhere? Is she just a smothering, so smothering that she can't not be everywhere her son is? Like, what's her dealio?
Mark:I think probably it's twofold. I think she worries the worst has happened all the time and so needs to needs to to, like, come in and cover for him. And then also is smothering and, like, I think she feels out of control and by controlling his life, which she should control his room a bit more.
Sarah:It's a mess.
Mark:That she regains some control, maybe.
Sarah:I think Elsa needs a job.
Mark:I don't think she's a very well developed character. She's the the crazy mom.
Sarah:But she's not even fun in her in her suffocatingness. No. Like she's not like trying to wipe his nose off and bringing him lunch.
Mark:No. You know? No. It's it's very weird.
Sarah:She needs a job, a hobby, something. I don't know.
Mark:So then they say that Poppy has a motive. And the motive is she could inherit the shop.
Sarah:Woah. Woah. How
Mark:do you not think that shop isn't in a mountain of debt?
Sarah:That place prints money. Are you kidding? He turns away half the customers that come in rolling in money. I think the way, in reality, I think the way a business like that stays in business now is they do an equal amount of online sales as they do in store sales.
Mark:Yes. I don't I don't
Sarah:They specialize. They have a lot of knowledge about things. Yep. And so they find things for people, for collectors who are looking for specific things. But that's not going on here.
Sarah:No. Like Lionel is not even paying close enough attention to know that Bart is like crushing up drugs and putting it in the diorama.
Mark:And like okay, I just want to reiterate this point. Bart is horrific. Yes. He is a horrific person. Yep.
Mark:And he is, it comes off as shy, it comes off as slightly awkward, it's not. No. He is horrible.
Sarah:Yeah. Don't confuse the two. No. Shy people are not all horrible.
Mark:My son has a variety of health issues. Yeah. Mental health issues.
Sarah:If she was treating his mental health as much as she's treating his water retention, maybe he'd have a better life.
Mark:I do like so Neil is his his is Mayor Neil is his uncle. His uncle. And they missed a good joke there because he says, well, I I must remind her of my brother. And what they should have said, what Neil should have said at that point in time was, well, we're twins. Yeah.
Mark:Like, that's a good joke.
Sarah:Yeah.
Mark:It doesn't mean it doesn't mean anything but it's a good joke. Yeah. But he says that she that is his hypochondria is all preventative.
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:And like he's only taking that stuff sounds like a lot of it just to make her feel better.
Sarah:He's not even taking it. Yeah. It's her preoccupation.
Mark:Yeah. Absolutely.
Sarah:So we don't know how the train store stays in business. How does paws, claws, beaks and fins stay in business?
Mark:Well Wanda is amazing. Okay.
Sarah:Wanda is Cleo's roommate and she also works at the pet store.
Mark:So Breen goes to find
Sarah:Cleo.
Mark:Cleo. And Cleo's roommate, who we don't know works at the pet store
Sarah:at this point Oh. Is
Mark:like, well, you know, she left and here's a lava lamp.
Sarah:She just moved out. She did pay the rent. If you see her, give her this lava lamp. Slam. And then thirty seconds later, she walks out from behind the counter at the bed store.
Mark:Because Breen goes to the other house.
Sarah:Yeah. Looking for her first.
Mark:So their house That gives her
Sarah:time to get to work. Is a train station.
Mark:Is a train station. Yeah. That's beautiful.
Sarah:That's kinda cool.
Mark:It's a thing they mention they don't mention, but works.
Sarah:Oh, remember that one that we saw online? I stalk Rightmove, which is The UK version of Zillow kind Oh
Mark:my gosh.
Sarah:And we saw this place that used to be a train station and was now a house and they had these train cars fitted out as like Airbnb's. It was so cool. Yep. And it was for sale. Yep.
Sarah:We could have bought it and moved there.
Mark:Was like don't if it's this country. Anyway Yeah. She's off today and we're really busy. Yeah. Breen's like
Sarah:What? Well, you gotta move the iguana again. It's all And
Mark:then we see Frodo smoking.
Sarah:He's vaping.
Mark:He's vaping. And it produces a phenomenal amount of I don't think they imagined it was actually going to do that much smoke.
Sarah:Well, it doesn't matter because nobody's thinking about it because Alden has just gone by on a bike in his hospital gown with the wind in his mustache. That is the funniest scene. Yep. And Frodo looks at his vape like what's in this thing? He's thinking somebody's gonna talk to him about pasta again.
Sarah:What's going on?
Mark:So Breen goes back to the train station house and hears a boom. And what it is is Starfire Jones is making movie.
Sarah:They wave those pistols around a lot.
Mark:They do wave those pistols around a lot and the whole movie subplot is weird and strange and doesn't need to be there. But it is weird that he edits their movies.
Sarah:That Bart free. Edits Cleo and Poppy's movies. Yeah. I mean, Bart's in love with Poppy. So he'll do whatever.
Sarah:I guess. He'll do work for free for them, I guess. Because what does he say? It means that I can be around people without being around people?
Mark:Yeah. I guess. Again, anything that is made to look sympathetic for him, I'd just test.
Sarah:I'm not sympathetic to him for editing those movies.
Mark:No. I don't want
Sarah:He's got like a monitor size freeze frame of her open on his second monitor. He's clearly just drooling over them.
Mark:Yeah. I think so.
Sarah:It is funny that Breen calls for armed officers.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:When he hears the gunshots.
Mark:Ten nine.
Sarah:He's like, mister professional. Yep. Tucking in the codes and stuff. Yep. Then he cancels it.
Mark:Cancels it.
Sarah:I don't think Starfire Jones' movies are gonna be very good.
Mark:No. I don't think But they're doing stuff.
Sarah:Yeah. I I guess they're making And doing
Mark:stuff. Why does Mike's whiteboard and his office have all this stuff about business? I don't know. Like all these different companies and shell companies and money.
Sarah:That's another case he's working on.
Mark:Some other case he's working on.
Sarah:I don't know. Would you want that job? Make up stuff that looks like it's related to something that isn't this and couldn't even remotely be this.
Mark:Would I want that job? Of course I
Sarah:would wear that erase board. And you need good handwriting to do it. Let's talk about Alden.
Mark:Okay. The traitorous bastard.
Sarah:He's got a great mustache though.
Mark:He does.
Sarah:And he's actually a kind person. Yes. He's kind to Cleo and Poppy and wants to include them in the new festival and thinks that Lionel is a racist bastard.
Mark:And I think he wants it to be inclusive not because it's just a way to have it happen But but he believes in the inclusive.
Sarah:He actually is kind of a nice person.
Mark:But he's bad at the gambling.
Sarah:Well, if you borrow money from fast daddy's cash bonanza, you're making poor decisions.
Mark:You are making poor decisions.
Sarah:Did he kill his first wife?
Mark:I do not believe so. I think out of
Sarah:the basket.
Mark:I would have nothing to do with balloons if that was
Sarah:No. If I Well, first of all, you'll never catch me in a hot air balloon ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever. Yes. If it was my only way of escaping, no. I will fight whatever it is that's chasing me rather than get into a hot air balloon.
Sarah:It's a wicker basket up in the air.
Mark:With with a giant flamethrower attached to it.
Sarah:And no way to steer. No. No. Thank you.
Mark:But they have a couple of nice shots. They have the nice shot of the balloon outside the police station.
Sarah:I love that he's making his great escape in a tethered balloon.
Mark:In a tethered balloon. I don't think you're supposed to notice it's tethered.
Sarah:Oh, no. He pulls himself down with the tether.
Mark:Well, I know that.
Sarah:Like, he's tethered. I think he's supposed to be so concussed that he doesn't notice it's tethered.
Mark:I think so. And our friend
Sarah:I'm with you.
Mark:The bullhorn makes him
Sarah:appear I'm with you. I don't think he killed his wife. Yeah. I think he was so bereaved that he changed his name and moved to start over because he was very sad.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:But though I agree with you, I would never get into a hot air balloon again if you fell out of the one I was in and died. But if that was their thing, then maybe
Mark:Maybe?
Sarah:I don't know.
Mark:My notes just say, you need more than one person to tether. So they go back.
Sarah:I just love that he thinks somebody's trying to kill him because he's so in debt to Fast Eddie who is long gone that he's escaping from the hospital and running around in a hospital gown on a bike. Oh, the rash you would get from riding a bike and No, thank you.
Mark:They go go to Bart's house to see all his toys. Yeah, they're toys. And he's got a nice Masters of the Universe shirt on though. I was impressed by that.
Sarah:That he doesn't deserve to have.
Mark:No. I agree.
Sarah:Gina says there are fibers, green fibers on the ear that missus Marlow found that clearly belongs to Lionel, the last Tetris piece that Gina's looking for. Yep. Top hats, they're not made out of unusual things.
Mark:No. Well, beaver fur.
Sarah:Well, that's a real top hat. Yes. This is not a real top It's probably made out of felt Yeah. Or acrylic felt. But Gina doesn't recognize those fibers.
Sarah:Yeah. And Lionel says it took him a month to make it. Yeah. It took you a month to hot glue some crap onto a green hat. Really?
Sarah:No. He must be really bad at it. But if he puts together dioramas and trains, he should be better at
Mark:it. Yeah. I would agree. Holden hides out in the cells with the Poor
Sarah:Willie locked in the cell.
Mark:I did notice something in that scene though. They have a sign that says interview in progress.
Sarah:Mhmm. That lights up.
Mark:They never use that because people go in and out or the door's wide open.
Sarah:They're like always lit up. I also noticed more card swiping in this episode. The beep from the card. Sims is swiping a lot
Mark:with her Yep. Fast Eddie was bad buggers.
Sarah:So Lionel was wearing the green hat. Yes. Right? That he made for Poppy that Poppy gave to Cleo. Yes.
Sarah:Cleo gives back to Poppy. Poppy puts it on Lionel's head. Lionel goes in the porta potty, kaboom blows up Tetris everywhere. Right? Yeah.
Sarah:When they ask Poppy and Cleo about the hat, Cleo says that Poppy gave her the hat as a symbol of their commitment.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:So your racist, misogynist, homophobic dad makes your girlfriend a hat and she gives it to you as a sign of your commitment?
Mark:No. No. He made the hat for his daughter. I know. And then his daughter gave it to her girlfriend as commitment.
Sarah:Would you want that hat?
Mark:I
Sarah:As a sign of her commitment? Here. Here's a hat my awful dad made.
Mark:I think they were kinda implying that it was really a nice hat.
Sarah:Okay.
Mark:Like a sexy hat. What is a sexy hat?
Sarah:Cheers to sexy hats.
Mark:What is a sexy hat?
Sarah:I don't think I've ever seen a sexy hat.
Mark:Hats are so now, I have a full head of luxurious hair, so I don't need to wear a hat, unlike some people. Sarah's ex husband.
Sarah:Bald as a cue ball.
Mark:But I don't know what a sexy hat is.
Sarah:I mean there are certainly outfits that are accessorized by a hat that are sexy outfits.
Mark:Yeah, but like a sexy
Sarah:hat for me by itself?
Mark:For me to think a hat is sexy, it means that you the only thing you got on is that hat.
Sarah:And then
Mark:And we know that a cowboy hat with a toque underneath does
Sarah:not qualify. But the but then the hat isn't the sexy thing. Yeah. Right? The hat just sitting there No.
Sarah:Is not the sexy thing. I don't care how many pairs of goggles it has glued to it or feathers or gears or whatever.
Mark:So at this point in time
Sarah:Maybe somebody will disagree with this. If you can think of a hat that you think is sexy all by itself Yep. In and of itself it is an attractive thing.
Mark:It should be able to sit alone and you go, oh, hey there, hat.
Sarah:Well, I'm not trying to say that you wanna do something with a hat. No. I'm just saying anybody wearing that hat would be accentuated by it.
Mark:So Poppy and Cleo come under suspicion here.
Sarah:Well, would inherit that shop.
Mark:And there is the clear reference that needs to be made, which is heavenly creatures.
Sarah:Right. Because their movie is called what? It's a play on heavenly creatures. I didn't even write it down because it was so lame.
Mark:It's a play on heavenly creatures. So Heavenly Creatures is a Peter Jackson movie. It was the first time that I had heard of Peter Jackson. I remember that we
Sarah:Now famous for the Hobbit movies.
Mark:Yep. 1994. I remember this movie came out and I was like, who is this Peter Jackson fellow? Because he's a fine director. Because Heavenly Creatures is a very good movie.
Mark:It has Melanie
Sarah:It's a good movie about two girls who kill one of their mothers with a brick. Yeah. And it's a good movie.
Mark:It is. Okay. It stars Kate Winslet and Melanie Linskey who has gone on to be a star in her own right. The two young people, maybe the first movie they were in, just doing phenomenal acting jobs. So they are recreating the Parker Hume home murder case.
Sarah:I know about the Yeah.
Mark:The fifties where two young girls are in a special friendship in the fifties, read from that what you will, who will have a magical, strange, imaginary world, which
Sarah:I know It's a folly folly do. Yes. Isn't that what they call it? Yeah. When two people are mentally ill together.
Mark:Yes. And they decide because they're being separated that if they kill one of their mothers then they won't be separated.
Sarah:Because one of the girls is gonna get sent off to a school or
Mark:Sent to South Africa. Yeah. So it's horrific. The girls were underage. They served five years each.
Mark:One of the girls then went on to have a difficult life afterwards. But the young girl who was from England originally moved back to England and is now better known as Anne Perry Mhmm. And she has like a billion books. Yep. That she wrote.
Sarah:Yep. She became a novelist.
Mark:Basically took her own crazy little world that she created and
Sarah:started She started over.
Mark:Started over and started writing
Sarah:We've all done we all did things in our teenage years that we look back and we go, why were we so into that? I don't even know why I like that. I had a Bon Jovi poster.
Mark:Oh. Come on. You're living on a prayer, man.
Sarah:I'd never killed anybody with a brick.
Mark:No. You know? But that that's you know, that movie must have been huge in New Zealand because that case was so huge.
Sarah:So they're making a steampunk version with Starfire James or whatever her name is.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:Where they get to cudgel her dad with a brick. What? Yeah. These two are never gonna be big filmmakers. No.
Sarah:They just wanna wear corsets and top hats and point flintlocks at people.
Mark:So and they end up that they're broken up. And Sims has a really nice scene where she says, you know
Sarah:You guys actually seem to care for each other. Don't throw it away so Don't
Mark:be weird. Don't be weird? And then we have Don't
Sarah:be like me, old and lonely, just eating soup.
Mark:Just eating soup. Everybody knows. Everybody knows about my soup.
Sarah:Then From a can.
Mark:And this is the thing we have not talked about from the very beginning which is when the fireworks are happening, Bart shows up, sees Cleo and Poppy at the exact moment that Cleo has been overwhelmed by the diuretic and peace herself. Mhmm. She's embarrassed. She thinks Bart is embarrassed because she peed herself, but Bart actually is
Sarah:Is shocked that she's alive.
Mark:That she's alive because he just blew her up.
Sarah:No. He just locked her in. Yeah. It hasn't blown up yet.
Mark:And then it blows up.
Sarah:Yeah. He thinks he locked her in the porta potty.
Mark:The the absolute proof that Bart is horrific is if you remember at the end of the of the cold open, he's sitting there with Lionel's arm on his shoulder screaming for somebody to help him and he is the cause of it all.
Sarah:Yeah. It's just Why is Oden in the porta potty?
Mark:Because I think he's hiding from the loan sharks. He's sad about it.
Sarah:What what makes him think the loan sharks are at the party?
Mark:I don't know, but I think he's taking a moment to be upset.
Sarah:Okay. Yeah. Because he's like in there crying or something.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:And Lionel goes, oh, it's you. And goes into the next one and then gets locked in.
Mark:So his master plan is to blow her up at the steampunk festival by giving her a diuretic forcing her to go to the bathroom.
Sarah:No. His plan is not to blow her up. His plan is to gas her. Yes. That she'll just be gassed to death people will find her later.
Mark:Yes. That's right.
Sarah:It's because Lionel flicks the lighter that he blows up.
Mark:He kinda was trying to frame Timmy a bit.
Sarah:Timmy, Alden, Lionel, everybody responsible for the event Yeah. Certainly Yeah. Would be in trouble. Yeah. Bart's not really thinking.
Sarah:No. Like, he blows up Cleo and Poppy's gonna be like, oh, I've loved you all along.
Mark:No. Yeah. And he also like, he's just killed somebody who is very important to him on accident. He doesn't have a second or moment of remorse
Sarah:He just goes to work
Mark:the next just goes to work the next day.
Sarah:Yep.
Mark:It's just really strange.
Sarah:I don't know if diuretics work that way. Diuretics don't make your bladder convulse. Yeah. What they do is they make your body take more water out of the tissues. Yeah.
Sarah:Rather than storing them.
Mark:Yeah. It makes you go to the bathroom but not explosively.
Sarah:It makes you pee because your body is getting rid of water. Yeah. And it just happens to fill your bladder. Yeah. It doesn't actually act on your bladder as far as I know.
Mark:Not that I know of.
Sarah:I take medicine that has a water pill as part of it, which is a diuretic and it doesn't do that. No. Of course I've never stored up fifty days of it and put it in a beer. Yeah. That pre planning that he does, he's just despicable.
Mark:He's he's poisoning her. I hope. For his amusement.
Sarah:I hope Elsa has a long hard look at herself. Yeah. After her son goes to jail.
Mark:Well, what's his last line? Can I see my mom? Like, they do a fantastic job of making that culture and that stereotype look as pathetic as it is.
Sarah:Yep. Meanwhile, Willie Nelson.
Mark:Willie Nelson. That's the dog's name.
Sarah:Belongs to Petra, one of the ex wives.
Mark:Petra Conway. Mike has
Sarah:a good relationship with all of his ex wives who are still alive.
Mark:He does. And I think they all were would like she's like, you got a red open like a
Sarah:She trusts him to give him give his her dog to him to look after. Like, they're clearly friends
Mark:clearly wanna spend time together.
Sarah:Yeah. To get along. So after the credits, Poppy and Chloe are gonna be okay.
Mark:Do you think they stay or do you think they go on their trip?
Sarah:I think they get out of there.
Mark:I think they that store is deader than
Sarah:I think it's sold Yep. For whatever they can get.
Mark:They're gone. They sold all the stuff online.
Sarah:They take the lava lamp and they go.
Mark:They go. Elsa. She's got a lot to look at in the mirror, but she's going to be going to the prison every week.
Sarah:You think? Yeah. I don't know. I think her son is nasty. She's gonna realize that.
Sarah:He's gonna go to prison and Elsa's gonna go, wait a minute. I don't have anybody to worry about. I can do what I want.
Mark:No. I can I can be me?
Sarah:I can join the secret ginger info network now if I want No.
Mark:I think she's gonna go every week to see him. I don't think he's gonna do well in prison.
Sarah:No. No. What about Alden?
Mark:Well, Alden manages to be okay because the people who lent him money are gone to jail. Mhmm. Now, usually in that situation we get a a selling of markers. Right? Yeah.
Mark:Right? Like
Sarah:I'm gonna say that they didn't have a chance to do that. I know. So he's free and clear.
Mark:I think he's probably free and clear.
Sarah:So he gets to keep on running his hot air balloon business and start his festival?
Mark:I think so.
Sarah:Or you think it's tainted now?
Mark:No. I think they they have the festival next year and they insanely do it in dedication to Lionel.
Sarah:Little footnote at the in the booklet.
Mark:But like Lionel though, I did like the line where Lionel went, I did all the paperwork and the budgets and
Sarah:the
Mark:plan. I did like that because Alden is none of those. No.
Sarah:No. He's twirly mustache, big hat Yeah. Standing up in front of the crowd guy. He's not no. He knows how to work the mayor though.
Mark:Oh, does.
Sarah:He does a good job at that. Yeah. Wow. There's a lot in this episode. I did learn what a dory is.
Sarah:Lionel says he just wants a piss in a dory.
Mark:Yeah. It's a cigarette.
Sarah:It's a cigarette?
Mark:Yep. Like a dart.
Sarah:So I learned that. I learned what a Mary Blaine was which is not Mary Jane.
Mark:The, the ear found in the in the, grass, I think, might be a little David Lynch homage.
Sarah:It's a
Mark:little blue velvet.
Sarah:I just love that Mrs. Marlowe brings it in Tupperware and says, just give it a rinse and get it back to me. Yeah.
Mark:The next week, she's there with the cheese rolls.
Sarah:As somebody who takes treats to work every week in plastic containers Yeah. If I showed up on a Monday and people are like, oh, cupcakes. And I'm like, no. It's an ear. They're like, ah.
Sarah:They wouldn't eat cupcakes anymore. No. Especially if I showed up the next week in this with the same container. Well, after I got out of prison for whatever I did to the person whose ear it was, guess. I found this outside while I was speed walking, para walking.
Mark:Next week, episode two of season six, Real Paige Turner. Not only is it a book episode, which is fantastic. Not only is it a Mike's wife episode, which is fantastic, but it is a Mike's wife who is a suspect in the murder episode.
Sarah:Alright. Wow. It's just I'm having trouble getting over how awful Bart is.
Mark:I had forgot I thought this was more steampunk than incel, and it turned out to be more incel than incel. Lionel's awful. Bart's awful.
Sarah:Yeah. Just irredeemable people.
Mark:There's no two sides shown shown. They are shown as irredeemable, horrible people, as they should be.
Sarah:Yeah. Yeah. Well, Frodo's coffee shop has a really beautiful menu. Yes. Though his coffee cups come in every color.
Mark:And wow, that's a lot of smoke, Frodo. Do really need to be smoking that much?
Sarah:It's vape. That's a lot of vape. Mike gets the coolest cup. It's black with a black sleeve and a black lid.
Mark:Yeah. That's a cool cup.
Sarah:They should all look like that, but they don't.
Mark:Definitely a cool cup.
Sarah:No. Sims gets a green one later. Sims. That's it for the power of steam.
Mark:So next week, a real page turner on March 31.
Sarah:See you then, maniacs.
Mark:Bye, maniacs.
Sarah:Bye, maniacs.
Mark:Thanks for joining us on the mystery maniacs podcast. If you enjoyed our crazy podcast today, don't miss out on future episodes. Follow us on social media for updates, beyond the scenes content, and exclusive sneak peeks. Subscribe, like, and share to spread the word. Bye, maniacs.
Sarah:Okay. They have matching hats on, but when they were walking up the hill, I thought their heads were connected.
Mark:And there is our outtake.
