All Things Buzzed and Pizza | Brokenwood | "The Garotte and the Vinkelbraun" | Mystery Maniacs Podcast EP237
Oh. Oh. And the splatters and the and you know, meanwhile. Hey, maniacs.
Mark:Hey, mystery maniacs. Welcome to Lovejoy.
Sarah:I mean,
Mark:Antique Roadshow.
Sarah:I mean, no no no. You're funny.
Mark:Mystery Maniacs is a comedy recap podcast dedicated to mystery TV. Each week we dig into an episode of the show including the murders, the mayhem, the loonies, and everything else we love.
Sarah:This week Broken Woods season seven episode one. The Garat and the Vinkelbahn. Vinkelbahn should have been something more interesting than a painter's name.
Mark:Yeah.
Sarah:It should have been like a luge ride or something like I'm gonna go ride the Winklebahn. Yes. Or have you ever driven on the Winklebahn?
Mark:You can go as fast as you want on the Winklebahn.
Sarah:That was the worst German accent ever. That was just Nazi. It was no it wasn't even German.
Mark:We have ways of making you Winkerbond. If you let your kids, touch the Winklebond or open the mystery cabinet, they can listen to the podcast. We are a spoiler podcast which means we're gonna give away what's in the mystery box as well as who the killer is. It's so weird we're existing in season seven now and season eleven at the same time.
Sarah:It's really confusing. We're doing mini episodes, the spoiler free teaser episodes for season eleven which was just released and has been rolling out. And rewatching and recording for season six and now seven. And my brain is just
Mark:And you think befuddled. That's only four seasons different. But we are not at the halfway point of Brokenwood yet.
Sarah:No because there's more episodes in the later seasons.
Mark:The later seasons have six episodes while the earlier seasons have four episodes. This is episode, our episode two thirty seven which trivia time means we have more episodes than Friends.
Sarah:Yes. It's official. But We're not nearly as popular.
Mark:Halfway through this season we will be halfway through Broken Wood.
Sarah:That's cool.
Mark:So, this is a big, big turning point for Brokenwood. A couple of reasons, one, they're off the government dime now. Mhmm. They gotta make their own money. I think that's one of the reasons why we see a step up in quality and difference in the show.
Mark:I think they're a little more in control than they were before. Also, this is an episode released the 03/29/2021. There's a six month sixteen month break between this and the last episode because the panini happened. Oh. The pandemic happened and we weren't sure what shows were gonna be made where and how and this is directed by Katie Wolf who directed the last episode and written by Tim Baum and that becomes majorly important.
Mark:Well, we survived the night, Sarah.
Sarah:Was gonna say, you mentioned the pandemic. I was gonna say, speaking of natural disasters, we survived one last night. We went so just a little aside. We went out to dinner for my birthday a week late because my birthday weekend was also graduation. Yes.
Sarah:You can't you can't go to McDonald's and get a seat on graduation weekend. Forget it.
Mark:So then I get Sarah Sarah said she wanted a cake and wanted to go out to a fancy restaurant.
Sarah:I said I'd like to have a cool cake. I've never had a cool cake. Yep. I've made them, but I've never had one. Yes.
Sarah:And you got me one.
Mark:So, wow. I could write a whole podcast about the the quest for this cake. It was six weeks I worked on this cake to get To get it.
Sarah:You didn't make it.
Mark:I didn't make it.
Sarah:No. I would have been impressed even if you did take six weeks.
Mark:I did take an hour and it took me two hours to drive to get the cake and
Sarah:It was worth it. Back and it was awesome.
Mark:So tell people who haven't seen the pictures what the cake looked like.
Sarah:Yeah. So I have to tell the whole story then. Yeah. So so Mark comes home from this long car ride to pick up the cake from the mysterious place where he got it made and brings it home and takes it immediately out to the garage in a big box and puts it in the fridge out there and then invites each of the kids to go out and look at it, but not speak to me afterwards. And they all come back going, oh.
Sarah:Oh. Ah. Then we go out to dinner and he has arranged for the restaurant to serve the cake. So I'm I'm still not allowed to look. Nope.
Sarah:Until they bring it out after dinner. And just as we finished eating dinner, the five of us, everyone's phone in the restaurant goes off Every because there's a tornado warning. Not a watch, not hey be on the lookout, but holy crap, there's one here now, right? So the first time it happened, everybody simultaneously picks up their phone. And there were hundreds of people in this restaurant.
Sarah:It's a hopping joint here in town. It's a really nice restaurant. And it was just weird to hear all of those alarms go off at the same time.
Mark:It
Sarah:was. But everybody kind of stayed put, right?
Mark:And we got the cake
Sarah:took some They bring the cake out.
Mark:We put the pictures on the subreddit and we posted pictures on the broadcast channel. I'll post pictures on all our regular channels so people can see them.
Sarah:Because it's
Mark:And I'll put one in the show notes.
Sarah:It's worth looking at. Yeah. I have to say. So all the only brief I gave you was I just want a fun cake, but it's not like from the grocery store, you know? Like a like a cool cake.
Mark:And And I was worried. Didn't get a lot of communication with these people, so I was worried I was gonna get a sheet cake that said, happy fiftieth Thera spelled wrong. Yeah. Like I was worried.
Sarah:But it was incredible. It was a two tiered cake that had little zombies, little hands and feet and little faces poking up out of grass on each of the tiers and dirt. And it was like gray icing. Yep. And it said zombies ate my birthday on it.
Mark:And it has
Sarah:It had tombstones and little skulls on Tombstones and little skulls. And pumpkins. It was probably odd to other people in the restaurant that we were having a Halloween cake in May, but I don't care.
Mark:I don't care.
Sarah:Because I loved it. It was awesome. And it was really good. It was chocolate cake with raspberry in between
Mark:the layers.
Sarah:It was tasty. So we eat the cake.
Mark:So we eat the cake, and then
Sarah:And then the alarm goes off again,
Mark:and I said, I'll take care of paying the bill and getting the cake. You guys go to the car.
Sarah:Yeah. Because our idea was that we were just gonna get home. And the kids and I pile out of the restaurant, and all of the wait staff is ushering people into this basement apartment underneath the restaurant, which could not fit everybody who was in the Half the people going down there were taking bottles of beer and wine and stuff with them. They weren't leaving them behind. But we were going to go to the car.
Sarah:So we go down this alley to the parking lot. And as soon as we peek out of the alley on the other side, we see rotating clouds. And I'm like, turn around, we're going back. So I send the kids down downstairs, and then I've got to find you. And you're like doing the math to pay the bill and leave a tip and everything.
Sarah:I'm like, come on. We gotta go. It's coming. I saw I saw it. There is a there was a witch outside.
Sarah:Let's go. And so we go down We
Mark:laugh, but there there are people who lost their lives. Not anywhere near us, but Yeah.
Sarah:But there was a tornado that touched down in town Yep. Miles away from where we were. Yes. But wow, was it a party down in that hallway?
Mark:Oh, it was.
Sarah:There were 50 people crammed in down there, half of them with booze in hand, and we're carrying a giant cake. And you know me. You're making friends.
Mark:I found a friend and a Leafs
Sarah:fan. Xander and I are about to have an anxiety attack because we're claustrophobic and it's loud and it's hot. And we're like, is everybody gonna die? I don't know what's gonna happen. So we were fortunate.
Sarah:So if you heard about storms in the Midwest, we were fortunate we were safe, but not everybody was near us and in states close to us. Yep. So we're thinking about those folks, but we will not soon forget that birthday dinner. Yes. Because it ended with a tornado.
Mark:And then we came home and watched hockey.
Sarah:Yeah. Yeah. And the Leafs won last night.
Mark:Yes. My hockey team won leading us to game seven on Sunday night.
Sarah:Which breaks the myth that you can't cut your beard or your hair during playoff season because I gave you a haircut yesterday and they still won last night. Yes. So we're safe. We're safe. You no longer have to look like woolly woolly during playoff season.
Mark:Unless they make it to the next round and then I can never cut my hair again.
Sarah:No. Then I have to cut it before every game.
Mark:That's not gonna work.
Sarah:Your hair grows pretty fast.
Mark:Okay. The reason why I started off with Lovejoy and or Antiques Roadshow is because this is a spoof, the opening for all things old and beautiful.
Sarah:Which is Antiques Roadshow Yes. On a much smaller scale. There's only two people. There's only two people. There's not an army of appraisers like there is on Antiques Roadshow.
Sarah:There is no Antiques Roadshow New Zealand. I look to see. UK version has been to New Zealand, but they don't have their own version of the show. Like they do in The UK and in The US.
Mark:Everyone is here.
Sarah:Maybe I'm a snob. I far prefer the UK Antiques Roadshow over The US version.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:And I love PBS. I do too. I think The US version is interesting But when you're talking about old stuff in The US, there's just not there's no comparison.
Mark:I gotta tell you, both of them became less interesting to me when I remembered the things they were showing. Like like comics that I had when I was a kid and posters from movies that I went to when they opened. Yeah. It was like
Sarah:As you become an antique, it becomes less interesting, isn't it?
Mark:So, yeah. Everyone is here.
Sarah:A ton of returning characters. So we've got Frodo. We've got what's her name? The the horrible reporter. Kushla.
Mark:Kushla. Gina's here. Mike is here.
Sarah:Ray and Trudy.
Mark:Ray and Trudy.
Sarah:Missus m.
Mark:And a Russian yak tusk.
Sarah:Is it a tusk or a horn? It's a horn.
Mark:It's a horn.
Sarah:Yaks don't have tusks.
Mark:And Mike's That
Sarah:would be like a cow with big pointy fangs.
Mark:Mike's trying to pawn off some 40 fives and they're like, oh, they'd be good if they weren't country.
Sarah:Yeah. And But Trudy's got a box.
Mark:This whole episode is kind of a goof on Mike for a couple of reasons and that was one of them.
Sarah:Yeah. He likes bad music. Yeah. So Trudy comes to the parking lot and she's carrying a box. Missus M says, I hear it's her ex husband's head.
Mark:Which okay, Trudy is not a legal person.
Sarah:But she's not going back to prison for taking her husband's ex husband's head onto the antique roadshow. Silly. Because plus it would be drippy, wouldn't it?
Mark:It would be drippy.
Sarah:And the cabinet's not drippy. We find out later it's just a bunch of doll heads, which is creepy. Yeah. But not illegal. What did you think was going be in the box?
Mark:Thought it
Sarah:was going When you first watched it.
Mark:Well, I didn't know what it was at first, but now because we've been watching so many episodes, I thought it was going to be the other high heeled shoe from the pair of shoes from the women's prison episode. Oh. Because we only saw one of those shoes.
Sarah:And it would be a true crime paraphernalia kind of thing, which could be valuable. Right?
Mark:Mhmm.
Sarah:So I thought two things. One, it couldn't be the same thing in in both senses. So I thought the the thing that was in the box when she took it to the antiques roadshow was gonna be different than the thing in the box at the end when it's a raffle.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:So I thought
Mark:Kristen wins by the way. We're a spoiler puck.
Sarah:Yeah. It wouldn't it wouldn't be her ex husband's head. All I could think of was that it would be Gwyneth Paltrow's head like in seven like what's in the box? So you'd open it and there'd be a head in there,
Mark:but That's better than putting a hole in the box.
Sarah:Maybe not a yeah. First step one, you cut a hole in the box. Yeah. SNL reference there. And then when Kristen gets it, I'm like, So now it's gotta be something different than what she took on the roadshow because people would have seen what it was when they opened it on the roadshow to give her an estimate.
Sarah:Right? So she would have swapped it out. So when Kristen opens the box in the pub at the end having won the raffle, I think what should pop out is a figure of Ray dressed like a pigeon holding a pizza, and it would have been an ad for Porky Pigeon Pizza
Mark:That would have been perfect.
Sarah:The whole time. That's what I thought.
Mark:That would have been perfect and very Ray and Trudy.
Sarah:Oh, totally. People would have paid $10 to to be advertised to. They would have loved that.
Mark:So our fans at home who are keeping count, we're at three businesses for Ray and Trudy right now.
Sarah:They have the frog and cheetah, the snake and tiger, and porky pigeon pizza.
Mark:Yes. Yeah. Okay.
Sarah:And Ray's side hustle as a bootlegger. Yes. The party special.
Mark:The party special.
Sarah:Which is pizza and two bottles of wine for a hundred dollars. That's pricey.
Mark:No they got more than a bottle of wine. Think they got a couple of bottles.
Sarah:I thought it was two. Maybe one of them is booze. Maybe. But still I guess if you're selling off license you're running a risk. Yep.
Sarah:You got a charge.
Mark:You got a premium.
Sarah:And he delivers in that three wheeled truck which is adorable.
Mark:That three wheeled truck, I wanted more of the three wheeled truck. I was like, why is there not more coverage of the three wheeled truck?
Sarah:We also have Jules back and she's got a new boyfriend, Lord Ashbury.
Mark:Yes. Who is wants to sell his vinkel balm. Now he doesn't wanna appear on camera, which is immediately you're like, oh, susamune, susamune.
Sarah:Everything about him is sus from the very beginning. First of all, why does he like Jules?
Mark:I
Sarah:If he's normal.
Mark:Because Jules is rich. That's why he likes
Sarah:Jules. She's rich because her husbands keep dying.
Mark:But apparently she likes he likes she likes him because, woah, he's got the stamina.
Sarah:Well, they gotta have something other than sex, sex, sex.
Mark:Sex, sex, sex.
Sarah:So they built schools in Papua New Guinea.
Mark:No, they don't. No,
Sarah:they just
Mark:takes all that money. There's also a reference to a blubber spoon here, which is a real thing,
Sarah:isn't it? Yeah. Is. Yeah. It's it's giant.
Sarah:Like a whaling thing. What do you think of Brian? Brian Bottom or Baton?
Mark:I think Brian Bottom is an excellent actor and a fantastic dead body and a sleaze as a human being.
Sarah:Man, is he a good dead body.
Mark:He is a fantastic
Sarah:Tongue out, eyes open, actually in the chair. Just keep your tongue out of your mouth for as long as he does.
Mark:Yeah. You don't have to do it. You can you can still breathe. You can have your eyes blink normally. Just keep your tongue out of your mouth.
Sarah:And don't move it.
Mark:Yeah. It's hard. He is a master.
Sarah:They must have been like misting his mouth in between shots because that would get so dry.
Mark:I guess.
Sarah:I'd be like, give me a cup that I can stick my tongue in. Okay.
Mark:I'm good now. Frodo wants an autograph. I'm
Sarah:sorry I had to jump around, but I love when Sims pulls up to the coffee cart and turns the siren on. Yes. And Frodo's like, you can see his brain go, should I run? But this is my business and I've done nothing wrong, but should I run? Maybe I should run.
Sarah:I don't need to run, but maybe I should. Like, his little gears are just
Mark:Frodo makes reference to his trauma. Not
Sarah:funny, Sims.
Mark:Because he's had a lot. He's been through a lot. Then there's a relic that is kind of a
Sarah:It's a Maori
Mark:It's a real thing Yeah. That is a red herring in the episode.
Sarah:Right. It's called a hei tiki. Yep. And it's a Maori relic. It's an ancestral thing.
Sarah:It should be treated with respect. A guy brings it in because he was digging a post hole and found it. Yep. And DK, who is the cinema photographer, videographer Yep. On the team is Maori and does not appreciate that disrespect of his culture.
Sarah:Yep. He's immediately set off. And of course, Brian, because he's a jerk in, out, sideways, is like, what's your problem?
Mark:I think it's worth like $50.
Sarah:You know, I mean just whatever he can say to make DK mad. Yeah. Because that's who he is.
Mark:Next week, we're in Riverstone. Of course you are.
Sarah:That's like five minutes away.
Mark:Five minutes away. Okay. I wanna be clear. This is not how television works. No.
Mark:They don't like, the talent does not travel with the crew in no matter what kind of show you're dealing with.
Sarah:I don't know about that. Second of all It could happen.
Mark:The crew shows up, sets up, the talent arrives, does their thing, and then the talent leaves, and then the crew leaves. It's it's not like let's get the band back together thing.
Sarah:I think it depends on whether you're really touring like this and filming in different locations. And there's no efficient way to get talent to that spot. So they may as well just travel with the crew. But like real antiques roadshow, yes. There is a gigantic crew that goes way in advance and sets everything up, and the appraisers come the day before.
Sarah:You know the appraisers on Antiques Roadshow don't get paid?
Mark:No, they don't.
Sarah:They have to pay their own travel and everything. Everything. They're just doing it for publicity.
Mark:And unlike this rigmarole, they cannot have any dealings with the people.
Sarah:No. No. They can't offer to buy something or
Mark:No.
Sarah:They're I think they're allowed to advise them or represent them a certain period of time after the show.
Mark:But it makes sense because they could totally take advantage of this situation.
Sarah:Absolutely. Absolutely. We have a new hotel. Yes. Or motel.
Mark:It's a motel
Sarah:where they're staying familiar face is running it.
Mark:They take everything
Sarah:They they book the
Mark:whole place. The whole place and the familiar face used to run the Tidal View Lodge. You remember what episode that's from?
Sarah:It's the one where the bride dies.
Mark:Yes. That's the bride episode.
Sarah:But he was going out of business anyway. Yes. He must have salvaged enough to buy a new motel. Yes. Not a new one.
Sarah:New to him. Yes. Those key fobs.
Mark:Those key fobs. I wish I had one of those key fobs Cause it would be fantastic.
Sarah:Oh, you want one of the ones from the show? Yes. Oh, okay. What's the name of it though?
Mark:I don't know.
Sarah:It doesn't it doesn't say anything?
Mark:Think it just says motel no vacancy.
Sarah:Sign does. Has two little pine palm trees on it.
Mark:Yeah.
Sarah:Marcus is wanting to go under the radar because of his bad experiences. Okay. It's just
Mark:He's a bit traumatized.
Sarah:It's just motel. Yes. Okay? Just stay at the motel. Motel.
Sarah:You could call it the white motel.
Mark:Maybe. And they find dead Brian doing and he's in a garage chair Yes. Which Sims knows everything about.
Sarah:You would. Yes. You know, seventeenth century Spanish torture device Yes. And execution device, which we've talked about before, by the way.
Mark:Yes, we have.
Sarah:But Brian has purchased it. Now what does he think he's gonna do with it?
Mark:How is he gonna trap like, how is he gonna transport in
Sarah:the van.
Mark:It's not gonna fit in the van.
Sarah:Oh, know. Do do you remember National Lampoon's Family Vacation?
Mark:Oh, beyond the top.
Sarah:Where they strap grandma to the top
Mark:the lawn Well, just strap Brian and the garage chair on top of the car.
Sarah:Well, he never pays for it anyway, so Sydney gets it back eventually, I guess. Where did Sydney get it?
Mark:I don't I don't know.
Sarah:It's a seventeenth century Spanish torture device. How is it in New Zealand? How is it in his shop? Should he even be selling it? Do you think he should be allowed to
Mark:sell No. I don't think he should. Certainly not for 900 Australian New Zealand dollars.
Sarah:No. He's trying to sell it for $3. Yeah. And he doesn't sell it for 900 because he never gets it. So Would you deliver that before you got the money?
Sarah:No. Oh hell no.
Mark:No. No. And the name of the
Sarah:antique shop is Just plain interesting.
Mark:Antiques, curious, strange and wondrous things. Oh, but there is a wondrous thing for this shop.
Sarah:There's another one across the street. Yes. There's a sign that says see our other shop across the street.
Mark:At 99 Parrs Road. And what I was absolutely stunned by.
Sarah:As soon as I saw the front of this shop, I'm like, skip it, Mark's all over this. Because there's signs everywhere on the front of the shop. Yes. There's even three-dimensional, like, little putter putt planes on top of the awning with little dudes in them.
Mark:Yep. But they have a new sign because this antique shop exists. Oh. And is named Just Plain Antiques. You can go here.
Sarah:Were they named that before the show?
Mark:I don't know because they have a newer sign. They've had an influx of cash it looks like Mhmm. Than the old sign. Mhmm. So I bet you they spent some money and got the new sign.
Sarah:Or maybe that's when they opened the second location across the street.
Mark:Yes. So this is
Sarah:When you have so much crap in your antique shop that you need a second location, the answer is not to open a second location, it's to sell the stuff.
Mark:Yes. So this is on the on the Western Side Of Auckland.
Sarah:Okay.
Mark:Right? It's part of the city and it's part of they've obviously film out of Auckland. Mhmm. So
Sarah:Do you think the inside and the outside are the same location?
Mark:I do. Because it's hard to like
Sarah:That's a hard set to recreate. That's a
Mark:hard set
Sarah:to recreate. There's a lot of junk in there.
Mark:Like it's much easier to do a bookstore.
Sarah:Yeah. Yeah. Behind the counter where Sydney stands to sell stuff is a big sign that says, thief. Who is he? Yes.
Sarah:Wednesday, September 25. Some some person stole something. Somebody. He's got stills from the CCTV. He does.
Sarah:I just wanted get a good shot of them. At some point, they never show them. No. Because I was really hoping that it was Frodo. No.
Sarah:Or somebody who looks like I
Mark:tried to see who it was, but I couldn't
Sarah:Wearing a shirt that says not Frodo?
Mark:That that was absolutely brilliant and outside of the real shop it has a sign that says steampunk gates that they sell.
Sarah:What does that mean? Gates that look like steampunky stuff. Like like for fences?
Mark:Yeah. Oh, Okay. It's very strange.
Sarah:They've got a pretty wide array of the typical kind of antiques and like junk shop antiques. Not like high end you know antiques like don't touch it antiques. But there's also a shot when Sims and Mike are talking to Sydney behind the counter and the camera is turned the opposite direction to look at Mike. Behind him is a display of fantasy axes.
Mark:That it's like They look like
Sarah:Lord of the Rings
Mark:It's like the Lord of the Rings section. There's a blue sign, but you can't read what it says.
Sarah:But it's weird because they're not antique obviously.
Mark:No. No. They're clearly not. But there are some weird things in this store.
Sarah:I just wanted one of those axes to play a part. I just wanted somebody to pick one up.
Mark:Kushla shows up and goes to the station and I have a note that says, should you really be able to see the murder board from the front desk?
Sarah:No. The answer is no. I thought the same thing. All she has to do is lean in a little bit and she's got a clear shot of the murder murder board. She'd be stupid not to like bring her camera and go.
Mark:And we have a flashback and this is the first appearance of the crew where they ate the night before. Porky Pigeon Pizzeria. Which is Porky Pigeon Pizzeria.
Sarah:Ray is the Porky Pigeon.
Mark:Ray is the Porky Pigeon and appears the first appearance of the Porky Pigeon costume which is not discussed
Sarah:Nope. At all.
Mark:Nope. Sims goes to talk to him. I think it's Sims Goes to talk to him. He's in the porky pig pig
Sarah:pig He's got head under his arm.
Mark:He's got the head under his arm and nobody says nothing.
Sarah:I can only assume that that was originally a longer scene and there had to been a couple of jokes. Or when she came back to the station, there had to have been a couple of jokes and they got cut.
Mark:And actually because come
Sarah:on, you have to talk about it.
Mark:Do you know the full name of the Porky Pigeon? No. The full name of the Porky Pigeon is Gourmet Ray's Porky Pigeon Pizzeria. That's what appears on the outside of the building.
Sarah:Why is it a porky pigeon?
Mark:I do not know. That is the worst name. You don't put pigeon on pizza. No. You don't want pigeons near your food.
Sarah:No. You don't He's not delivering by drones. It's just think he I think he found the mascot outfit cheap and then decided to name the pizza restaurant Porky Pigeon so he could wear it.
Mark:I think that is a very Ray thing to do.
Sarah:And I would be very disappointed if the head of the pigeon doesn't have a chef's hat on it.
Mark:Well, we see this outfit again. Not next episode, but I think the one after the the bank robbery episode. Mhmm. Because remember one of the individuals involved in the bank robbery, I believe is a delivery person for Porky Pig
Sarah:That's right. Pigeon. But we haven't talked about the weirdest character, Buzz McCartley.
Mark:So Buzz is a fantastic character I wish we saw more of. Because he's got such a fun outlook on life.
Sarah:Well, you don't know that initially though. He seems really dark and creepy initially. Initially, yes. But then His business is called Fully Buzzed.
Mark:So Buzz Lightyear's thing is that
Sarah:His name is not Buzz Lightyear. It's Buzz McLarty.
Mark:So his thing is that he has purchased or his mother has purchased a number of spoons.
Sarah:No, Mark. She has collected 47 spoons from small cities all around New Zealand. It's her life's work.
Mark:I'm laughing.
Sarah:Because your mother had a spoon collection.
Mark:That I contributed to.
Sarah:My grandmother had a spoon collection.
Mark:So when I went to England the first time on my own, this would be '94.
Sarah:Mhmm. When I was there too. Yes. But we weren't together. No.
Sarah:Because I didn't know you.
Mark:No. Every place I stopped I bought a spoon for my mother.
Sarah:Yep. My grandma was the same way. Everywhere she went she bought a spoon. Time anybody else went somewhere they bought her a spoon. But I got She had five racks like that.
Sarah:Yeah. One that he's carrying around. But God knows what
Mark:you're
Mark:supposed
Mark:to do
Sarah:I
Mark:also got her spoons from Moscow and Leningrad in the eighties. When I went to The Soviet Union. His love of his mom
Sarah:and He loves her so much he carries her with him.
Mark:And the spoons made me there there's a there's a spot in my heart for
Sarah:Buzz Lightyear. Because he's living in his van Yes. With his little altar to his mom.
Mark:But he's also like, you know what? I go surfing when the surfing's surfing. Yep. I work when I work.
Sarah:Well and that kind of philosophy leads you to live in a van. But if you're happy then okay.
Mark:I guess and you're fixing lights in the middle of the night.
Sarah:He's got a mullet.
Mark:He does.
Sarah:A mangy mullet. He does have a Kind of a ragtag surf outfit. He does. But he seems happy.
Mark:He does.
Sarah:And he's honest. He does he tells the truth.
Mark:He absolutely tells the truth.
Sarah:How we've not seen him before, I don't know.
Mark:I wish we saw more of him.
Sarah:I wish we didn't see so much of Kushla. She gets on my nerves.
Mark:She
Sarah:is She's the worst stereotype of a local journalist.
Mark:She is indeed. So we also and he is the one who says the clown car was there delivering
Sarah:Yeah. The three wheeled truck
Mark:that the pizza and Lord Ashbury was So now we're like, oh, we need to go to the big house.
Sarah:Jules' place.
Mark:Do you want to see the Winklebrunn?
Sarah:Do you want to see my Winklebrunn? He's so clearly not who he says he is.
Mark:No. No. It can't just be sex sex sex all the time. We met in a resort overseas. I'm like, oh my gosh.
Sarah:You are so getting taken for a ride, Jules. She always falls for the wrong guy.
Mark:Yes. And so we have him doing the thing that I hate men do where they're like, oh, know, Kiwi women. And Mike's like, you're awful.
Sarah:Yeah.
Mark:And I'm gonna bring you down.
Sarah:Yeah. I love your women. Yuck.
Mark:Right after that is where we see the outside of Ray Gourmet Ray's Porky Pigeon Pizzeria. Remember, the full
Sarah:name. Mhmm.
Mark:Which due to the place next door, I found where they filmed this. Of course you did. It's actually Zach's Pizzeria.
Sarah:Well, is now.
Mark:Yes. So I'm assuming that they filmed on this location because it had pizza oven
Sarah:Oh yeah. At the counter
Mark:and and
Sarah:The red and white checked tablecloths. You have to have those. Yes. They're a requirement.
Mark:So so Zach's became Gourmet Ray's, but the place next door that I wanna shout out is Phoenix Beauty Therapy. I would not have found this restaurant if it wasn't for free Phoenix Beauty Therapy.
Sarah:Thanks, Phoenix Beauty Therapy.
Mark:There there is only one Phoenix Beauty Therapy in the entire world, so I found it.
Sarah:Do they burn you to ashes first and bring you back beautiful?
Mark:Of course, again in Auckland. So
Sarah:I just I the table that the crew is sitting at in the restaurant is so claustrophobic and so sitcom y.
Mark:And no one else is in the restaurant. Of course not.
Sarah:Of course not. But how is Ray running the restaurant and
Mark:also doing By
Sarah:himself and doing delivery. Which means Trudy is running two bars by herself.
Mark:And doing and doing the mascot stuff.
Sarah:Yes. Yes.
Mark:No one asked these questions but us.
Sarah:They're they're entrepreneurial.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:I'll give them that.
Mark:So then we get the the rest of the crew involved. The sound lady, the the director, the producer, all of these people become involved in the story. And I, of course, am only interested in one thing because the sound lady's t shirt says Dingbats record joint. Yeah. Do you know what Dingbats Record Joint is?
Sarah:Obviously not. It is. Nor does anybody but you.
Mark:It is a vinyl bar that is in the art gallery of New Zealand in Auckland. That's awesome. It is so far a fantastic place. I love that t shirt. They have all sorts of cool stuff that goes on in there including live bands.
Sarah:I'd buy you one, but tariffs.
Mark:If you were if we ever go to Auckland, we're definitely going to It's a great name. It's like that that t shirt's cool. It's got a astronaut lady on it. Like this is like pushing all my buttons.
Sarah:Well, Zealand's cool.
Mark:Yes. Yes it is.
Sarah:Places and museums here are like hoity toity cafes with overpriced dry sandwiches.
Mark:Yes.
Sarah:They're not fun places like that.
Mark:And she gives her files to the direct the producer who then says, these files are crap.
Sarah:Because they're just recordings of Gemma taking a bath. I don't know why these people choose to drink and then do their rushes. Like, do the work first, then drink and go to bed. Yeah. Don't drink and then go and try to do initial edits or transfer files or whatever.
Sarah:It's just not good practice. Though I think at work we have the same sound recorder that she has.
Mark:So that sound recorder is a Sound Devices six eighty eight. It is a expensive sound recorder.
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:They use real cameras and real sound recorders. Mhmm. I got that from the single frame that shows And
Sarah:a real clapper.
Mark:Yep. They do indeed. And there's nothing on that clapper that shouldn't be on their eye check.
Sarah:I figured as much so I didn't bother.
Mark:So the police get involved with Earl, Lord Earl, early Lord. They call the lawyer and who shows up?
Sarah:Of course Jules will call Buchanan.
Mark:Because we've got history.
Sarah:She should just stick with Buchanan. He's the only normal guy she's ever had a fling with. Like
Mark:Oh my gosh.
Sarah:He's a normal guy.
Mark:Wow. I can't believe he said, well, we have history.
Sarah:Yeah. Context is important because he doesn't want to get back to her you know.
Mark:But he's completely amazed because it's a lord and an Earl whatever it is.
Sarah:Pims and all that So Ashbury's pulling this off because his real name is Earl. Earl. His first name is Earl.
Mark:Yes. Because that's what appears on his passport which there is a problem of when we get to the passport.
Sarah:I have not met many men whose first name is Earl but the ones I have met would have never been able to pass themselves off as any kind of royalty because overalls and royalty don't go together. It's not very convincing. You gotta wear shoes if you're royalty. No offense to Earls out there. But there's not a whole lot of dudes named Viscount No.
Sarah:Who are pulling that off No. You know, as a first name.
Mark:No. It's a fun little thing they play around with. And we find out that the sound device was recording, as you mentioned, Jemma taking a bath but it also records the Earl leaving.
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:So he's out of the frame. Mhmm. But as he's leaving, do you know what happens?
Sarah:I don't.
Mark:Okay. As he's leaving, they come across a newspaper.
Sarah:Oh, yeah. Yeah. As he's leaving the police station you mean, not leaving Brian's room.
Mark:Yes. Oh boy. This newspaper is a gem amongst gem.
Sarah:It's the one with Kushla's lead story with the earl
Mark:holding his hand No. No. No. Kushla does not write this story.
Sarah:But it's the but that's her photograph
Mark:on the front. Yeah. Was her photograph. Okay. It's got
Sarah:But she doesn't run it's not her byline even though it's her photo?
Mark:Oh. No. No. Oh. There's a there's a rabbit hole here.
Sarah:Okay.
Mark:First of all, the Brokenwood Courier, which I quote, Brokenwood's best, most beautiful, most wanted newspaper.
Sarah:That's a lot. It's the only newspaper.
Mark:Yeah. The headline is, and they do this so perfectly, because you see this newspaper incredibly briefly.
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:The the headline is, Oh, Lordy, which is in italics, Earl Anthony Ashbury under suspicion. So if if you look really fast, you see Lord Earl Anthony. Yeah. But that's not what he is. No.
Mark:The headline talks about him being brought in and and there's a little bit about him being at the suspicion.
Sarah:And the fourteenth Earl of Ashburi or something.
Mark:Yeah. So the last line of this headline is
Sarah:The last line of the article?
Mark:No. It's just like a tiny subhead Okay. Right? Above the picture. Mike looks so pissed in the picture.
Mark:It says, this news is brought to you by Fact Fellet Stander of TBC, which is the Brokenwood Carrier, in the fabulous weather. Ah, the beautiful smell of spring. Bam.
Sarah:Faxful Philisander is the Fak,
Mark:f a c k. Okay. Falexander. Okay. They're
Sarah:goofing on you.
Mark:Wow. I could not believe that when I saw that. I was like, oh, yeah, baby. I'm following
Sarah:you now. I got you. I'm I'm I'm seeing you. You're seen. You're seen.
Mark:Yep. You're seen.
Sarah:We haven't even talked about Jenny. No. The cohost. No. The killer.
Mark:The killer? But there's so much to talk about in this episode because this is a great episode because you completely forget about her.
Sarah:Yep.
Mark:And then you're like, oh, wait a minute, she did it.
Sarah:Yeah. Well, because she's so put together and polished and smiling all the time and she's very busy and she's pretty and whatever.
Mark:Well, was a weather girl that obviously Frodo
Sarah:had a thing for.
Mark:Had a thing for.
Sarah:But her alibi is that she's online with her boyfriend watching a zombie movie together. Yes. Because she's on the road a lot and this gives them quality time. Yes. There's a lot of allusions to maybe they weren't just watching the movie.
Sarah:Glenn. But they were clearly I don't I don't know how you could feel romantic while watching that movie, but apparently they did.
Mark:Well, I bet you a young filmmaker could feel romantic and a young actor could feel romantic about it.
Sarah:Why do you say that?
Mark:Well, the people in the knowledge would recognize that movie immediately as Brain Dead.
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:Which is a New Zealand comedy horror movie.
Sarah:From the early nineties. Right?
Mark:Directed by a very young Peter Jackson, his first movie and starring a very young Tim Baum.
Sarah:Who
Mark:is? The writer of this episode.
Sarah:Yes.
Mark:Yes. That everybody in New Zealand went to see. It was incredibly popular.
Sarah:So when you're watching the clips of the movie while you watch this episode, the guy who picks up the lawn mower and starts mowing down zombies
Mark:That is Timbal.
Sarah:Wrote this episode. Yeah. It's a small world and those people get around.
Mark:Yep. That's just fantastic.
Sarah:And it's so funny that it's playing on her laptop while she kills Brian. Yep. You know and Bryce is sitting there going like, oh, oh, and there's splatters and you know, meanwhile, she's killing somebody. Sorry, Glenn, not Bryce.
Mark:Glenn. Yes. So then they Mike is on the trail of the Earl and goes to the bank and he finds out everything he know needs to know. That they're trying to flog the painting to use it as collateral on a loan To build a school. Actually pays for the Jag.
Sarah:Yeah. She's leasing she's leasing the car and she's mortgaged her house.
Mark:And he goes to see the Earl and the Earl just gives him his passport.
Sarah:Yep. Because it's one of many that he has.
Mark:But there's an interesting thing on the passport. Okay. His date of birth is listed as the May 6
Sarah:Mhmm. '15. '19 '15?
Mark:It could not be 1915.
Sarah:It couldn't be 2015.
Mark:Exactly. It is the wrongest year of all time.
Sarah:Or does he have another painting in the attic like Dorian Gray? Maybe. I think that's probably what happens when you use a dead person's documentation to get a new identity is that you end up with a year of date that year of birth that is wrong. Maybe. Brian Bottoms driver's license only has his name on it.
Sarah:Yes. Nothing else. And a photo of him in his jug ears and nothing
Mark:else. That's all it has.
Sarah:Because you're not supposed to look at it that closely Mark. Fact Fazzle, Fact F Alexander. That's your new name. Fact F Alexander.
Mark:Fact F Alexander. Ah, the beautiful smell of spring.
Sarah:They just ran out of text.
Mark:Oh, they just ran out of text.
Sarah:And put in whatever they wanted to.
Mark:That is just fantastic.
Sarah:So I'm rewatching this episode, and I'm watching the throwback to because eventually Jenna has to confess, She did it. And first of all her hair is impressive because the hair that we see her in the most is her real hair, the actress's real hair.
Mark:Yep.
Sarah:Then she pretends to take off a wig that looks like her real hair. Yes. And underneath it is a wig. Yes. Though we never see her actually take one wig off the other wig.
Sarah:No. But it's good. But she's a fantastic actress. They're doing a good job cutting that. Yeah.
Sarah:So that you don't you get the impression, but you don't see it. So anyway, so I'm rewatching it. And I'm watching her put Brian in the chair, and put the strap on his neck, and put the pin in, and then put the strap across the top of his arms. Yes. And I'm thinking, could he reach that pin?
Sarah:So I paused this show on my laptop, and Mo's in the room, and I'm like, hey Mo, this is our oldest child by three minutes. Hey Mo, come here. If you were sitting like that, could you reach it? So now Mo and I are in chairs in the kitchen Doing with our arms, our elbows pinned down to our side
Mark:Doing dinosaur arms.
Sarah:Trying to reach our own ears. Like if you can reach your ear, you could reach it. And I think he could.
Mark:I think he could.
Sarah:I don't think he has time to try. I don't
Mark:think he I think he could. I
Sarah:think he could reach that pin.
Mark:Yeah, I do. If he had a long like, if she had just put him in the chair and tightened it
Sarah:And the whole time she was off with a in there or something. Yeah. He probably could have. But I don't think he doesn't people like him don't think that anybody's gonna pull something on them like they would pull on somebody else. Yes.
Sarah:So he's not suspicious. And then she offers to take the photos and he's like all about it. Yes. He's smiling. He thinks he looks Brian, you don't look good.
Sarah:It makes you look like you got a triple chin going on.
Mark:It gets all fetishy then.
Sarah:Yeah. He's gross that way.
Mark:He is gross that way.
Sarah:But I think he could reach it given enough time.
Mark:I think so.
Sarah:But then she just turns it. And the back of your neck hurts just thinking about it. And the photos in Gina's lab of the back of his neck, it's like there's one photo of just the dent on the skin and then there's another one where it's clearly cut away to show the damage. It's like, that would hurt so much.
Mark:And he definitely doesn't have time. His neck breaks. Yeah. She breaks his neck. There's no satisfying
Sarah:Crunch. Crunch. Because there's too much screaming from the zombie movie.
Mark:Maybe, yes.
Sarah:But it definitely would like gurgle crunch maybe? Maybe? He'd go, fat. You fat Alexander's me.
Mark:Gina tries to give Mike his her Russian yacht horn and he doesn't take it.
Sarah:No. Oh, there's a He gets rescued just in time. Sorry. Gotta go.
Mark:There is a great joke that we skipped over completely where Mike is looking into Brian Bottoms finances.
Sarah:Uh-huh.
Mark:And he goes, what is this incredibly large payment?
Sarah:Oh, the regular regular deposit. Simpsons says that's his paycheck.
Mark:And Mike goes, and he almost looks at the camera.
Sarah:Yeah. That's more than I'm making up.
Mark:And he goes, I'm in the wrong business.
Sarah:Yeah.
Mark:Which is of course incredibly funny because the
Sarah:buzz is He is in that business.
Mark:He is in that business. And like like they're total that's why I mean the whole episode is like joking on Mike.
Sarah:Yeah.
Mark:Like the yak horn thing is totally joking on.
Sarah:You put it under your husband's pillow because it keeps him awake and has more opportunity.
Mark:I'm sure you don't have any problems with that. Oh, that is inappropriate, Gina.
Sarah:There's a class you need to take with HR.
Mark:Yes. Lord Ashbury disappears. Jules is trying to find him and Mike thinks about lying to her but doesn't.
Sarah:Oh he can't. Yeah. But we don't see him tell her. No. But he does obviously.
Sarah:Yeah obviously. Because she's in her purple jumpsuit suit at the end and she's mad. Yeah. She's got an axe and stuff. And it's not one of those fantasy axes, it's a real one.
Mark:Yeah. So I understand her destroying the Winklebond Mhmm. But not the car.
Sarah:No. Not the car. She's gotta pay the payments on that car. Yeah. No matter how long it's leased for, it's on her.
Mark:I know.
Sarah:Though maybe she's happy to pay it. She doesn't care.
Mark:Don't worry. We see Jules again. She's at least one more episode.
Sarah:She's at least one more man in her life who's gonna be bad.
Mark:And this is where Sims wins the mystery box prize.
Sarah:Yeah. Because Kushless bought a ticket for her.
Mark:Which really should be like coupons at Ray's Gourmet Pizzeria. Not not not actual money.
Sarah:No. Coupons. Discount. Discount. Not even free pizza.
Sarah:Not even free pizza. 20% off for the next year for one pizza a month, but not the supreme. No. Like, because Ray's tight. This is this is why I think that when she opens it, it should be like a purp a da purr.
Sarah:Yeah. And a little pigeon pops out.
Mark:Yeah. Something.
Sarah:With an ad for Ray's Pizza.
Mark:Instead, it's incredibly scary doll heads that never get mentioned again.
Sarah:There's a Kewpie doll in there. Yeah. There's That's the only whole doll I saw. The other ones were just heads.
Mark:It's weird.
Sarah:I'll tell you what's weird. I just happened to catch a video the other day on YouTube. It was an old Pathe news clip of a doll production factory in The UK. And they were just casting the heads. Yep.
Sarah:So they were casting these rubber heads and pulling them out of the molds and then painting the faces on them and sewing the hair on heads. That's be weird. And it's very weird to see these they pull the doll heads out of the molds with pliers and they go Yeah. You know, out of these molds and they throw them in a bin and there's a whole bin of faces. Oh my gosh.
Sarah:And then they've got like a whole rack of the winky eyes, you know? And they have this tool that they jam the eyes into the face I
Mark:know when you do that type of work you
Sarah:You don't see it as a doll face Yeah.
Mark:Right? But wow, it would've been
Sarah:It was weird. I can only imagine. You start working someplace like that before you get real jaded, you just see those faces in your sleep. Yep. And Kristen's gonna see them every time she opens that cabinet.
Sarah:Kristen, we're in here.
Mark:What we've learned from this episode is Ray and Trudy will start many many other businesses
Sarah:Mhmm.
Mark:Including, and this is where our episode series seven and series 11 crossover. The the place at the beginning of the episode, and I love that they do the callback to the beginning of the episode is really the inciting incident because Yeah. A, it's an inciting incident and that Brian's gonna leave her and have his own show.
Sarah:And he says that just as they're about to film that that
Mark:Start of the episode.
Sarah:Trailer. The
Mark:teacher. The start of the episode. Yeah. Like I I love it all working together like that.
Sarah:But that location, the mill Yes. In Brokenwood Yeah. In season eleven Is new and Trudy's pub.
Mark:New pub for Ray and Trudy where they have live bands.
Sarah:Yes. Which leads to all kinds of problems.
Mark:And comedy. Yeah. No. They don't have comedy there. No.
Mark:They have oh my gosh. They've
Sarah:already had the comedy.
Mark:But we know we know that they have so many businesses. But this is the end of Frodo's businesses. He runs the coffee cart from this point He's
Sarah:found his niche.
Mark:He's found his niche.
Sarah:But there's the frog and cheetah, the snake and tiger, porky pigeon pizzeria.
Mark:And the new pub which is the panther and something.
Sarah:I Panther.
Mark:Which is series 11.
Sarah:Panther and tadpoles. I don't know what
Mark:it is. Maybe we'll learn more at the bank robbery episode because we definitely see more of the porky pigeon at that point in time. Yes. So what happens after the credits? Jules finds another man.
Sarah:Maybe she swears off men for a little bit longer this time.
Mark:Maybe.
Sarah:Maybe.
Mark:I hope that Mike calls some international police organization to get after Earl.
Sarah:Yeah. Well, because he's he's just taken off with the money that Jules got from remortgaging her house.
Mark:Yeah. He just took off.
Sarah:And she has a huge house. Yeah. So that's a considerable amount of money.
Mark:And
Sarah:And he's traveling under a face fake passport and
Mark:Yep.
Sarah:He's done this before and
Mark:Yeah. He's not a very good career criminal since we immediately knew he was sus.
Sarah:Yeah but she didn't. And if there hadn't been a crime that they were involved in he would have totally got away with it for as long as he wanted We
Mark:know Kooshla shows up again, we know Ray Pizzeria shows up again. Buzz Lightyear doesn't show up again. We wish he had.
Sarah:We don't see Marcus again. No.
Mark:I don't think we see Marcus.
Sarah:We forgot to mention that Sydney's Antique store, the plain interesting antique store is a new antique store for him because he's the same antiques dealer who was in earlier seasons selling taxidermy and antiques and had some of his taxidermy stolen.
Mark:And travel agency don't
Sarah:That's right.
Mark:And trying to sell Pocahontas outfits too.
Sarah:Yeah. The white ferret on Mike's desk is from his store.
Mark:The white ferret.
Sarah:So this is a new place for him.
Mark:This is just plain empty.
Sarah:So Sydney's got a new place. Marcus has a new place.
Mark:We know.
Sarah:Ray and Trudy have a new place.
Mark:We we okay. So you and I and the listeners of this podcast while they listen to the podcast, I don't believe they remember anything after our podcast is done. So you and I and like three people on this show know all of this stuff. This is this is like this is the nightmare. Like we get somebody like Frodo on the show and we go, what do you think about this?
Mark:And they're like, what?
Sarah:How many is is why is I'm not in those scenes. I
Mark:don't I have no idea.
Sarah:We'd almost have to talk to Tim Baum.
Mark:I think so.
Sarah:And say, okay. How many pubs have Ray and Trudy owned? Yes. He might know.
Mark:So so Tim, if you're listening, please
Sarah:You were great in that movie.
Mark:You were. I think he was. Yeah. I probably saw that movie sometime in the nineties.
Sarah:And we think it's totally clever that you managed to get the clips from that movie into the show into this episode.
Mark:Your buddy, mister Jackson.
Sarah:If you're nasty.
Mark:If you're nasty. Okay.
Sarah:It's Peter if you're nasty.
Mark:Just when you thought it couldn't get better.
Sarah:That's what's in Trudy's box. Yes. It's a little Peter Jackson
Mark:Peter Jackson with the with the lawnmower. Yes. Brokenwood Mystery season seven episode two. We will release that on the May 26. The Witches of Brokenwood.
Sarah:And we still have minis to come.
Mark:We have two more minis to come. I can't believe how much content we've come out with this month and we've really had a lot of people, like as many people listening to the minis and asking questions about them as with the full ones. If you get stuck on a mini question, please just message us. We'll tell you the answers right away.
Sarah:Oh, yeah. We don't want you to suffer until we get to season eleven.
Mark:Oh, my gosh. Season eleven will
Sarah:be But you can also post a message on the subreddit and just mark it spoiler Yes. So people who haven't seen it
Mark:yet know how to read I all the questions on when I post the minis on the subreddit. So just reply to that there.
Sarah:Yeah. But then other people will see it.
Mark:Yeah. Just reply to that thread with the spoiler tag.
Sarah:Oh, then it'll be hidden.
Mark:Then it'll
Sarah:be Unless people click on it. Yeah. They so they won't accidentally see the answer. Yes. It's fun.
Sarah:Alright.
Mark:So so that is the Winklebronn and the The Garat. The Garat and the Winklebronn.
Sarah:So next week season seven episode two.
Mark:The Witches of
Sarah:Brokenwood. Until then, bye maniacs.
Mark:Bye maniacs. Thanks for joining us on the mystery maniacs podcast. If you enjoyed our crazy podcast today, don't miss out on future episodes. Follow us on social media for updates, beyond the scenes content, and exclusive sneak peeks. Subscribe, like, and share to spread the word.
Mark:Bye, maniacs. Bye, maniacs.
Sarah:That's cool. I don't know the the name of the next episode. Okay.
